Wednesday, September 19, 2012

“Some Day My Prince Will Come…or Not”




Young girls, teenagers, and college students are bombarded with images of getting married to the perfect guy, finding Mr. Right, and being taken care of by a man from an early age.

There are plenty of great female role models out there, but I am amazed at how many capable, intelligent young adult women do not start planning for their own future because they are waiting for Mr. Right to come along and take care of them!

Don’t get me wrong, women have come a long way. But I see many young women that put off dealing with their financial issues because they are waiting for a man who makes enough to take care of all their future needs. The reality is, Prince Charming may never come, or may not be the breadwinner you are looking for. This lack of self awareness often drives women to under earn, over spend, and push off taking control of their finances into the future.

There is nothing wrong with the desire to meet prince charming, but don’t ignore or postpone taking control of your life in the hopes that someone else will come along and solve your problems.

If you are in a low paying job, don’t waste your time and energy looking for a high earning man. Evaluate what you want out of life and figure out what you need to do to earn more money.

If you need inspiration, go out and buy the book “The Secrets of 6 Figure Women” by Barbara Stanny. It is an informative and empowering book.

Our earnings limitations are usually a result of our belief systems. If you have the desire to be more than you are today, earn more than you earn today, you may start feeling guilty or uncomfortable, thinking that somehow you don’t deserve it. The negative thought processes of using vocabulary that include, “I can’t”, “I won’t” or “I don’t,” can become self fulfilling prophecies. As Buddha observed, “All things that we are, arise from our thoughts.

Twenty three years ago when I entered the financial services business, I was scared to death. It was a struggle to come out of my comfort zone and enter into unknown territory. I had to tell myself I had unlimited potential. I told myself I could take care of myself and my daughter financially and would help others do the same. Did I believe this at first? No, but I wrote down positive affirmations, I wrote what my future would look like. I would recite positive affirmations in the shower. I knew being financially secure and independent was possible. I just had to squelch the voice in my head that tried to defeat me.

In my case, the pain of divorce forced me into action and I knew I had to go outside my comfort zone to change my life. The pain of a financial challenge is often the catalyst for taking action.

If you are facing a challenge, write down what your future will look like with you in charge!

Make a poster board (or use Pinterest) to post pictures of the positive things you will have in your future and a loving partner can be one of those. Look at it every day.

Take ownership and control and believe that you, and only you, can make the necessary changes to have a brighter future in which you are in control. Find a successful woman to mentor you so that you can affirm that what you want out of life is within your reach.

The beauty of this life is that all things are truly possible as long as you believe and are willing to work. In the words of my father, “the harder you work, the luckier you will be.”

I invite you to share your story with me on how you changed your life or how you plan to in the future.

Take charge!!



Note: Due to industry regulations on communication, we are unable to allow for public comments on this blog. Please feel free to email me your questions and/or comments to kathy@fishandassociates.com. Securities and Investment Advisory Services offered through NFP Securities, Inc., Member FINRA/SIPC. NFP Securities, Inc. is not affiliated with Fish & Associates